Why I Fight To Spread The Word To End The Word

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World Down Syndrome Awareness Day is later this month, on March 21. For some of us, every day is awareness day.
Six years or so ago I started a new job. Within a few days of my start date another woman also began working at the company. Our department wasn’t a very big one, so we all spoke with each other to varying degrees. This woman, who we’ll call Elle for the purposes of this post, seemed friendly enough. She was in her twenties and had two kids. I hoped we’d get along. Within a few days I was doubtful that we could physically work in the same office, much less get along with each other. Why? Because she frequently said the R word.
For those of you that have gotten this far in this post and in life that don’t know what the R word is, it’s the word retarded. My youngest son has Down syndrome and is mentally retarded. NOTHING makes me more upset than hearing someone misuse the word in a derogatory way. When I hear people I know say it as part of a conversation with me I almost always explain to them that they are not using the word correctly and that they are hurting people. Sometimes it’s a losing battle. last year my oldest son asked me why I always went out of my way to correct people, including kids he knew. I explained that by not saying anything I was signalling that it was ok and they would never know that it was wrong and ignorant. Back to my story.
Elle dropped the R word in casual conversation a couple of times in the first few days there. The first time I let her know nicely why I found it offensive. The second time I nicely reminded her. The third time I heard her say it I never got further then clearing my throat. The fourth time she started to say it all I had to do was shoot her a glance. I never heard her say it again after that. I’m sure at first that she tried to remember not to say it to keep peace. But I believe that over time she made it a point to try and understand my feelings and why use of the word was wrong. It’s been over five years now. We no longer work together but I am happy that I can consider her a friend. I know now that she wouldn’t use the word that way again, and I think that given opportunity she might even explain to someone else why it’s wrong.
This video with well-known actor John McGinley summarizes it beautifully.

People use and accept the use of the word in inappropriate ways. Some know what they’re saying and choose to continue saying it. Some don’t fully understand what they’re saying because they’ve never been told.
Words are tiny little things that have a lot of power. Power to heal. Power to hurt. Choose your words carefully. You’ll be respected for it.
One person can make a difference. YOU can make a difference.
Please don’t use the word in this way, and please help educate others why it’s wrong to do so.
Please help Spread the word to end the word.
Tomorrow between 8-8:30 am ABC Good Morning America will air a segment on Spread the Word to End the Word, be sure to catch it!
Also, I’m planning something for tomorrow her as well so please check back.